Lol, Email craziness

I just checked my gmail account. Its the email address I use for things I know I'm gonna get:
A) Spam
B) Stuff I don't care about
I have 326 messages since last time a checked, a couple months ago. But, check this out, I even have a "Spam" folder that has 909 messages. I wonder how the other 326 messages slipped by that? I have everything from a $1000 Wal-mart Card, CSI training (how to get my Forensics degree - wtf?), testing Dell laptops, my college options, 2 min. quiz to get an iPod touch, etc. Its pretty hilarious to me. Not that I'm gonna sit here and read all 326. But the good thing about gmail is it has like unlimited storage (well, that was an exaggeration, but, ya know...gmail). My "Spam" folder is where it gets even funnier. I got this one email from a "Mary" telling me about how my Credit Card Debt has been canceled. Uh...thanks? I wish I had a credit card, I woulda just saved a bunch of money, lol. I have many, many weight loss emails (what, am I FAT?!?!?!):
1. Health Labs - Drop 20 lbs for Summer
2. Health News - Shed 25 lbs. in 20 days
3. SlimNews - Drop 17 lbs. in 27 days for free!
4. Health News (again?) - Josh drop 23 pounds before in 30 days. (what's that mean?)
...the list goes on and on. that's about 1/4 of what's on the first page. I also got an email from "JapanesesSecret" saying "Women needed age 25-55." I don't even know where that came from - since I'm not a woman nor am I ages 25-55. Funnily enough I didn't get anything from Viagra or any type of ya know...growth hormone. I know this isn't as funny as it would be if you were sitting here looking at my inbox yourself, but I thought someone out there might get a laugh out of it.